Alright. So, I’ve got flu, and I’m really feeling shitty now. Still… I’m quite sick and tired about the vibes I get from people and I’m so gonna rant about it! You know, quite sometime ago, some guy told me that I had a “bitch-face”. After that, one of my better guy friends said that too. I think maybe it’s true, because too many people give me that “I-Dislike-You-Vehemently” sot of vibes that make me feel as unworthy as the rubbish in the pantry after a meal. It’s damn sickening ok. And one more thin I realise, people like to play games with me. On alternative days, they are nice to me. On others, they either ignore me or just shut me out. What the fuck is that for? Did I do something wrong? If I did, please say so! Don’t play such mind games that I have no desire to involve myself in! It’s sickening, and I’m sick and tired of it! Bloody hell, I even see it in people damn close to me, and I feel more hurt than anything. If there is something you can’t/don’t want to say, well, just say so. I’ll leave you alone, for gads sake!

I’m so tired of feeling like a thrown aside doll, like I don’t matter! It sucks, ok! It bloody SUCKS! And nobody fucking tries to understand, not my friends, not my PARENTS! Fuck, My parents throw the dumbest shit at me and all I can do is to say, ok. Fuck that! And that guy who said that he needed alot of space, fuck that too! You can have all the space and distance you want! I don’t bloody care! You can stay at some random astronomy tower and ignore me, because I’ve given up! I’VE GIVEN UP! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU AND YOUR BLOODY SPACE! FROM THIS MOMENT ON, YOU FUCKING DON’T EXIST.

I’m so tired… Feel like crying, but I can’t do so. Everyone also say “Stay strong, and you can do it”. But I feel so bloody tired. Then when I look around me and see people suffering, I feel so bloody selfish. I am, huh? That guy that called me “bitch face” would definitely agree. I AM SELFISH.